Weekend writers block...

Only 700 words left on my second course essay. This is without doubt the hardest essay I have ever written and that is saying something! Normally I can whip up a half-decent piece of writing in a few days but this course is really challenging. Not that it's a bad thing of course. It just means I am going to have to really plan ahead with the next one. Really think about what's needed before I even start the background reading. It might help to keep up with the reading too and not get behind!

I did manage to dump a lot of stuff yesterday, gradually clearing some of the clutter in my flat! Next weekend the Christmas decorations go up and I have just one pile of paper to send to be recycled and the floor will be as clear as it can be. My kitchen is done, the annoying bar stools that I never use have been dumped and the millions of carrier bags are being recycled so I can finally sweep the floor without having to move crap around! I have even bought some Christmas decorations to go up in the kitchen. Next up, the bathroom and my shoes! :-) xx 

The "Quarter-Life Crisis" and dating excitement.....

I have been sat at my parents house thinking of something to write about. Trawling through various websites for inspiration, I came across an article posted by Candace Sesi on Hello Giggles called the  The Quarter-Life Crisis and I can relate to it so much!

You can read the full article here but I have taken out some bits that are so relevent to my life and how I have been feeling over the past few months:

“The Quarter-Life Crisis”

Author Unknown

It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are a lot of things about yourself that you didn’t know and may or may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.

You look at your job. It is not even close to what you thought you would be doing or maybe you are looking for one and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and are scared.

You worry about loans and money and the future and making a life for yourself and while wining the race would be great, right now you’d just like to be a contender!

What you may not realize is that everyone reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out

This article is so spot-on it's scary! It's so nice to know that I am definitely not the only one out there feeling this way.

Lately I have found myself thinking about my life and how it is turning out. I know I have so much more I want to do and time seems to be getting away from me a little bit. I feel like I have missed opportunities along the way and I also feel a little bit like I should be much more satisfied with my life than I am. I am almost 30 and it has taken practically all of my 20s for me to figure out what I want in life! By now I thought I would be married with children and be happy and settled. I am happy but not nearly as much as I should be.

When I split with my boyfriend of five years two years ago I became more independent, took control of my life, started living alone for the first time....and then got comfortable again. It took another year and a half to get moving on my next project, my teaching course, which I have finally started and am enjoying. Thinking back, I needed that time to adjust and settle myself so in a way I am glad that I took a bit of a step back.

I do think sometimes I am going to be 'left on the shelf' as it were! It's hard being single, not having someone there to share things with and to come home to after a hard day at work. I am starting to miss these things more and more and as I get older sometimes it feels like I am never going to find that special someone. I have been on dates but just haven't felt that connection with anybody. With one guy, I found myself hoping that I would feel something. We got on so well and had lots in common but I couldn't feel attracted to him....it's so frustrating. Am I destined to only fall for men whom I have no future with!!

Having said that, and I don't want to say too much in case I jinx it, I did go on a fantastic date the other night with a fabulous man I met at work! We have known each other for about a year now and recently we've been emailing a lot. Suddenly, he asked me out! I was quite shocked but pleased as he is such a nice guy but I was scared too. I thought it would be another case of, "nice guy...but I just don't like him that way"....how wrong was I??! It was fabulous! That is all I will say for now! :-)

'via Blog this'

Wining and Dining....

I am quite excited for this week....I have a date on Tuesday! I am going to watch the new Twilight film and then I am being taken for a meal at a posh Indian restaurant in town. It's been a while since I was treated to dinner and a movie and it's been even longer since I have met a person who really seems interested in me. 

Here's where I am going. I have never been before.

Anoukaa Menu

Isn't it weird how us girls always seem to want what we can't have. We don't want to know the ones who are interested but we can't get enough of the ones who aren't! It's almost like we live in a dream world where we will eventually win the heart of the man who ignores us and who seems too out of our league. We always hold on to a bit of hope that one day he will realise that what is right in front of him is what he has wanted all along. Or something like that anyway. Of course in reality, we either win his heart and realise the fantasy was better or we get bored and move on to someone who likes us back. In my case, I am bored! It's time I was chased for a change!

I will report back on my date on Wednesday! xx

Organisation is the key....

Finally I have some time to sit and write! These last few weeks have been hectic to say the least but will pretty much be the pattern of my life for the next few months. At least I am now starting to settle down and start using my time a little better. Organisation is key to success! Where have I heard that before?

Anyway, I thought I would go back to basics today, a little journal entry to catch up on what has been going on in my life the past few months. Since starting at the school a few weeks ago I have been so much happier at work. I am getting closer to my goal and doing what I want to do so it's a lot easier to deal with the stuff I have to do...if that makes sense.

The children are great, a proper mixture of characters. I am still finding my feet there so I am not quite sure exactly what my role is but I am really enjoying getting stuck in and doing a bit of everything. My favourite thing so far is working with little groups of children on an activity. I really want to work with individual children, maybe listen to them read or something. It would also help with my relationship with the children. Right now, my course is looking at how relationships between children and adults in schools are so important. It helps a child if they know that the adults in their life respect their learning and their abilities. Also, it helps teach them how to communicate with each other and form their own way of learning.

There is so much to learn and think about it's no wonder it's taken me so long to organise myself. I have taken to writing a log of my time in the school alongside my course notes so I can put all my thoughts down when the school day is over. My head would explode otherwise and I would forget everything! Now my daily work life is fairly well organised, I can look at getting my flat organised and finishing my Christmas pressies. Yes, I do have the time! Only today, I sorted out all the plastic bags I have in my kitchen and cleared a load of space after cleaning my sink and putting away the dishes! I still had time to do some reading before writing this entry. And I will still be in bed by 10.30! Brilliant! I think I might be getting the hang of this! xx

Can it really be...

I cannot believe it has been over a week since my last entry. I have been so busy with work, school and studying. Right now it seems I have no down time at all!

I will be back tomorrow with a decent entry I promise! xx

Remember, remember....

...the 5th of November. Gunpowder, Treason and Plot!

I love Bonfire Night, the fireworks and the fires. It's so much fun; almost an extension of Halloween celebrations with a slightly different twist to it.

As a English girl born and raised I have to admit that the story behind today is odd, if not gruesome if you really think about it. On the one hand, it is an old thanksgiving celebration. Guy Fawkes and a group of Catholic followers attempted to blow up the Houses of Parliament and kill King James I, on the 5th November 1605. The idea was to replace King James with a Catholic monarch. Following the failed attempt, the day was marked as a day of Thanksgiving for the Kings survival and bonfires were allowed to be lit in celebration, hence Bonfire night. As you can imagine, Catholics suffered heavily for this and anti-Catholic laws were made even tighter. This was an England that was torn by religion. For years, Catholics and Protestants fought for control over the country.

The conspirators

On another hand, we celebrate the death of the ring-leader of the group of wanna-be assassins, Guy Fawkes. Convicted of high treason, he and 3 of his fellow conspirators were sentenced to death by being hung, drawn and quartered outside the very buildings they planned to blow up. They were hung until nearly dead then disembolwed while still alive, castrated, beheaded and chopped into pieces, their body parts displayed on spikes around London as a warning to other would-be trouble makers! Guy managed to escape the 'drawing' part of the execution as he jumped from the Gallows and broke his neck....some would say he was lucky! 

To this day, children and families build 'Guys', effigies of Guy Fawkes, to burn on the bonfire to mark the occasion. Over the next few weeks, fireworks will be heard and fires will be built and watched in commemoration of this day. I am going to the display in Whiteparish where my parents live next Saturday to eat hot dogs, jacket spuds and toffee apples and watch some amazing fireworks.  Thankfully the negative connotations of this day are gone now and it's a chance to get together with friends and family, wrap up warm and have some good old-fashioned fun.

So tired....

This was me this morning!

I have been slowly getting back in to work, the gym and everything else and I am shattered this week already! I have had no time to unwind at all least of all post anything interesting! I am back in school tomorrow so I have a shorter day, more time to play and study of course. Hopefully after an early night I will be able to post something more exciting tomorrow!